It may seem strange, but I never thought in this day and age that I would feel like I need to protect my child from strangers' comments about his race. Interracial marriage has been legal since June of 1967 thanks to the Supreme Court's decision about the Loving couple. We now have elected not only our first African American president, but a biracial president at that. With all the acceptance that my husband and I found in places like California and even Indiana, I did not expect that in a large metropolitan city on the East Coast we would face the kind of insensitivity. This blog is not intended to be a social or political commentary, but an incident that happened on Friday has been bugging me and I feel like I should say something about it.
We went to the mall after work on Friday, and my husband went to a shoe store while Kaden and I were in a clothing store looking around. Kaden was just hanging out in his stroller while I looked, and we passed by a young couple. This couple looked to be in their late teens/early twenties and were part of a minorty group. The girl smiled at me and said "ahh how cute" to Kaden. As we passed, the guy said something to her and she said "yeah, but they make cute babies. Like Jon & Kate Plus 8." They make cute babies? Like Jon & Kate Plus 8? They didn't mean anything bad and I didn't say anything to them, but it has been something I've been dealing with for the past few weeks.
The part that bothers me is the quick categorization. As if he wasn't just a cute little boy. His differences are what they noticed. Comments like that make me wonder about every time we pass by people and they comment about how cute he is- do they really think he's cute or is he just like the kids on Jon & Kate Plus 8? I don't want him to grow up thinking he is cute because of his race or to always have his differences pointed out to him. He isn't like most of the kids he will go to school with out here, but that doesn't mean he has to feel different. He is beautiful just because he is. We will celebrate all of his heritage as he grows up and he will know and appreciate all of his family and culture. But being biracial does not define him and is not the reason he is cute or a reason for him to always be different.
Perhaps this day it bothered me because it was a culmination of things- it seems like we always get those comments. People make very insensitive comments to me, maybe thinking that because I am white it couldn't bother me or maybe they really don't think about what they are saying before they say it. But it just makes me want to shield my baby from all those kinds of comments and stares. I just want him to grow up proud of who he is and feeling like he is an extraordinary little boy not just because of his race, but just because he's him. I happen to think he is quite extraordinary and beautiful!
Sorry- no pics this time! I though since I was ranting I would save the pictures for next time.
Tree Playing
1 year ago
1 comment:
I don't think you should worry about Kaden, because everybody is different, even if some are white or black or mixted, look at me...you can't see it, but I'm mixed...french-american ! That's a lot of differences too ! By the way, you're baby is beautiful because you're beautiful and Rob too ! Know that I'm thinking about you ! Love, RebeccA
Post a Comment